I’ve been sitting.
Sitting in limbo for a few years now…
About my career goals,
about my children,
about my getting married
sitting contemplating my future!
And in the last year and a half – simultaneous to letting my hair loc and
letting go of my obsession to control how my life should look –
Now – is an interesting time – a time where clarity is our doorway out of limbo
Now let’s be clear…
Sitting in the abyss is torturous –
It’s a forgotten place where the future isn’t certain, your family is a distant memory and your scream for help is unheard.
And many of us – at this time will experience the nothingness associated with limbo
because of the global pandemic of being infected by a virus,
Because black lives still don’t matter
and although we are all globally in tune and interconnected with each other through a channel called the internet.
In reality – for clarity – we are alone.
Sitting in Limbo.
The doorway of light doesn’t always come from the TV – it has a crude way of confusing white perspective with the natural agent that stimulates sight and makes things visible
However, as I sit sat in my limbo of a future I managed to channel some actual truth from a TV set that is usually set to distort.
The BBC offered this frequency – hidden none the less - as their usual BBC promoters stayed silent, frightened to fan the Black Lives Matters shouts and the locked up standing up
To be clear… this channeling was overdue.
Two years after the fact with no type of notice I Tuned into Sitting in Limbo. The current experience of the majority was here. And what I’ve noticed is human rights just is simultaneous with the right of the non-whites - fighting to live.
I can’t breathe – because you’re on my neck metaphorically as well as for real
I can’t breathe because a virus is attacking my capacity.
Sitting in limbo retells the story of Anthony Bryan.
His story (along with many others) exposes the his-story of the hypocritical, bullying. Supreme in infecting others.
Restricting existence to detainment and stressing the psyche to a space where you just sit.
This one-off drama exposes the scandal, the supremacy, the systemic racism of the descendants of the Windrush.
Set to reveal - my TV set took a new channel as it set to unveil the racism in the UK. Which is set usually to mute. As we learn how the Windrush generation is from the windrush ship that set sail from Jamaica in 1948
We also learn how the back-handed treatment of the windrush generation today, 70 years after people from all parts of the Caribbean and their children were invited.
All of us from the diaspora – whether personally or politically – are affected by this discrimination.
That feeling of the abyss comes rushing back… as the virus keeps us in-side in-fear not knowing how to step forward if we or are relatives risk being sent back… to a place that’s not bad but unfamiliar.
Where is home?
Sitting in limbo about my career, children, marriage?
I’m feeling grateful for breath!
I watch actors re-enacting something I know is not a story but a truth. Anthony Bryan a 50 year old BRITISH truth.
A truth that hides itself in lies and imperialism!
A truth that exposes how someone who legally came to this country as a child on his mothers passport could face deportation to Jamaica…. After 50 years!
A truth – the truth – A truth that as uncomfortable as it is… clear!
I wonder if in the deep psyche of supremacy – my life, black lives are here only to serve white survival.
Special #shoutout to Nadine Marshall
I have been heavily inspired by this amazing actress since 2008 - watching her in Random by debbie tucker-green.
I’m drawn to the types of work Nadine is involved in. It reminds me that - my decision matters.
It reminds me that in the dark abyss – the limbo I am forced to sit in because of the many viruses trying to kill me. The light to the door out is clear… is integrity.
Sitting in Limbo on BBC Iplayer
A factual Drama - Written by Anthony Bryan's half-brother, novelist Stephen S. Thompson